Jagged Heart

Forgive me if I’m timid at times. Don’t mind me if I come off a bit shy. Try to understand if I begin to pull back because see I’m so used to bad times, people hurting me, abusing and misusing me. I’m not use to being loved and I’m almost certain I don’t know what it looks like. In my mind I painted a picture of what love was supposed to be seeing as it wasn’t surrounding me. My image was a bit blurry. Kinda fuzzy around the edges. Like a picture that the lens of the camera hasn’t focused yet. But as I grow to feel what I think is love for you the image gets clear. The more it clears the more confused I get. The more unsure I am about how I’m feeling. Is love supposed to feel this good? See all the people who came before you claimed they loved me and then they hurt me or they disappeared. It never felt like this. So I’m scared that I’ll grow accustomed to this high and then I’ll fall. I’m scared that I’ll grow happy in this place and then you’ll let go. I don’t know to love because I myself am broken. But when I look at you I forget about all those jagged pieces of my heart. There is safety in your eyes. Every thing in me tells me to run. That this will end just like the last. But I’m here. I am trying to enjoy the journey because I don’t want it to end. But all good things must come to an end right? Just promise when you let me down you’ll let me down gently.