Real one

I guess I’m the definition of a real one. All the shit I’ve put up with and yet I’ve never folded. All the tears and sadness just trying to love you. It was like trying to show affection to a cactus. You fought me and pushed me away just so you could “do you”. Why did I hold on? Time and time again you showed me real commitment wasn’t what you wanted. And yet I stayed. I have a habit of holding on to people that don’t want to be held on to. Maybe that’s what’s imprinted in my mind from years and years of chasing people to make them love me instead of simply loving myself. What does that say about me? I must be broken. I must be dumb. I must think that I’m special enough that someone, anyone will change their ways for me. But who am I? Why should I feel like I deserve someone to want to hold on to me? Why should anybody wanna love me? But yet I’m loyal. I’m always loyal. I’m always the ride or die. The one that is in a persons corner. But when I look around my corner is empty.